Summer .

School is over, well for me at least. It's summer time and all that I feel right now is excitement and happiness, it's such a great indescribable feeling. I'm not saying that I don't like school but it is honestly something that I don't prefer, I basically just tolerate it just to get through. Because honestly who actually enjoys school? School is just stress on stress on stress on stress for me and I consider summer time a time to release it all, not in a bad retaliating way but in a good way for the most part. This school year was a good one for the most part, I buckled down and tried my hardest and had good grades most of the time, but there is ALWAYS room for improvement and that is how I constantly challenge myself is by telling myself that there is always room for improvement and I'm a lot better than what I'm doing. I will be a senior in less than 2 days so it's time to start getting a little more serious, because colleges still do look at grades from your senior year. This is probably one of the most pointless posts that I have ever done for this class but this is basically the only thing on my mind so I decided to write about what was clearly on my mind, because other than that I'm really not in school mode anymore which probably isn't good considering school really isn't over yet, but I know where I stand with everything and with all of my school work so I decided to just get out of school mode, but not completely yet. Summer time isn't just a time to lay back and relax but to also get all of your stuff together and to start preparing yourself for your future, for whatever you decide to take on in your later life. It's a time to start figuring out for a definite where you want to go for college and what you want to do once you get there, but at the same time it's not time to stress over things that basically don't need to be done right that second, but it's always good to be prepared and to know what you want to do with your life, especially at this point and time when you're about to be a senior. This post is basically a diary entry for me because it's not a story I planned out it's just a bunch of pointless but not pointless shit that is on my mind. I plan on doing my best and always trying hard starting the beginning of my senior year, I really want to do something with my life and go somewhere with my life in the future. One thing I do need to work on with myself is my laziness but that's something a lot of people struggle with, especially when it comes to the end of the year because a lot of people see it as a time to wind down and to start being lazy but that's also when teachers decide to load us with a bunch of tests and projects and stupid pointless homework's. You may think they're pointless but they actually might help you out in the future whether you think so or not, and that's something we all really need to realize or we're going to have a lot of trouble in the future, we all need to start being more responsible and stop complaining about every little damn thing we have to do, yeah it might suck but there's a reason that you have to do it, so we all need to suck it up and stop being such babies about it. Seriously guys, it's time to grow up.

Chattering Teeth.

My teeth were chattering, it wasn't any different than any other cold winter day. I knew that I should have layered up in clothes, but it was too late I had already left my house and was already half way to my friends house, and of course I was walking. Probably not the smartest thing to do, especially when it was extremely cold and windy outside which of course made it a hundred times colder. I was so cold and the whole time I was trying to convince myself that it was all in my head and it really wasn't that cold outside, it honestly worked for a minute if I was lucky, and before I knew it my teeth were right back at it chattering again & a lot faster than they were before, just my luck right? I started to walk a lot faster so I could just get to my friends house, by walking faster it got my adrenaline pumping faster which kind of warmed me up. I finally got to my friends house, I ran inside and jumped under a bunch of warm blankets. She said she wanted to go out to hangout and I looked at her like she was crazy or something. I said to her "I think I need to defrost myself first, I'm frozen." She laughed at me but I really didn't think it was funny. From that day forward I made sure I dressed a lot warmer so I wouldn't have to deal with those annoying chattering teeth ever again. :)

Family Is Forever .

It was the middle of my sophomore year and things really started to take a turn for the worst. Everyone who I thought was my friend all of a sudden started to turn their backs on me when things started to get complicated & I could’ve sworn that was when your friends were supposed to be there the most, but clearly I was wrong. This had to be the first time that I realized that through anything that possibly comes my way my family will always be there no matter what happens. At the time I really didn’t realize what I was doing was wrong, I didn’t think I had a bad reputation but I honestly did. It’s not that I was doing things to get it that way it was just the way I acted and the way people took it. I guess I really didn’t want to realize it, people were constantly talking about me and in the beginning it really didn’t bother me but after a while it started to really get to me & I remember I would go home every night and cry, because people would seriously make it a bigger deal than it actually was. When all of this started happening and I was known to have a bad reputation all the people I thought were my friends and the ones that I thought would be there for me and be helping me along no matter what happened were starting to turn their backs on me. I felt so invisible, I felt like I had nobody. But once my family found out what was going on they sat down and had a talk with me, I always thought that my family was just there for whatever but at this time during this situation I realized my family was there for me through thick and thin and they would help me along and they were here to stay. I never really knew the meaning of family is forever until my whole world started to crash and burn around me and in the end my family was the only people standing right by my side. I remember this like it was yesterday, I was at dance class and I had found out that my “best friend” was trying to get rid of me but do it in what she thought was a nice way, she would tell everyone but me that she didn’t want to be friends anymore. I was so furious at first but then all of a sudden all of that anger turned straight into tears and I didn’t even know what was going on. Everything was such a blur at that moment, so she pulled me aside and said "I'll come over after dance and me you and your mom will have a talk" so I said fine and just went about my dance class, but I was absolutely miserable the whole time because I felt so left out and I felt so invisible and I felt like nobody cared. So come the end of our dance class me her & my mom went back to my house and we all sat in my room. At first it was awkward and the tension was something I just couldn't handle, so I finally broke down and said "You're supposed to be my best friend but you're talking about me to other people and trying not to be my friend anymore" so she started getting into everything and telling me things I already knew, well what I thought I knew at least. It was basically a reality check for me, and my mom was telling me the same things that my best friend was. That conversation really affected me and made me think, maybe it was time to change my ways or the way I was doing things; because clearly the way I was already doing things just weren't working. So from that day forward I made a change in myself and the way I seen myself. This all goes to show you that your family will ALWAYS be there no matter what life throws right in your face without any type of warning. So as the year went on my family was standing right by my side helping me change and go through it all, because it wasn't easy at all. There was a lot of pain and struggles that came along with it, up to this day I still deal with a lot of the shit talking but no matter what you do that's never going to change, it's just something you learn to deal with. But I always know when anything happens my family is sitting right there waiting to help me, and each and every time I get through it because of them. It was one of the biggest events in my life, and it made me realize for the first time that my family would always be there for me no matter what.